#66: My Mistake (Was To Love You) by Marvin Gaye and Diana Ross

City: Ottawa, ON
Radio Station: CFGO
Peak Month: August 1974
Peak Position in Ottawa ~ #3
Peak position in Vancouver ~ did not chart
Peak Position on Billboard Hot 100 ~ #19
YouTube: “My Mistake (Was To Love You)”
Lyrics: “My Mistake (Was To Love You)”

Marvin Pentz Gay Jr. was born in 1939 in Washington D.C. His father was a Pentecostal church minister who never held down a job for more than three years in a row. Marvin’s childhood consisted of “brutal whippings”, since Gay Sr. would strike him for any shortcoming, including putting his hairbrush in the wrong place or coming home from school a minute late. Marvin later stated, “It wasn’t simply that my father beat me, though that was bad enough. By the time I was twelve, there wasn’t an inch on my body that hadn’t been bruised and beaten by him.” He also said that “living with Father was like living with a king, an all-cruel, changeable, cruel and all-powerful king”. He later recalled, “if it wasn’t for Mother, who was always there to console me and praise me for my singing, I think I would have been one of those child suicides you read about in the papers.”

Gay Sr. was an alcoholic, and a cross-dresser. Marvin Gay started singing in church when he was four years old. His father often accompanied him on piano. From the age of 11, Marvin was encouraged to pursue a professional career as a singer. In the mid-50s, Marvin was part of the Dippers and the D.C. Tones, both doo-wop groups. In 1956, after being kicked out of the house yet again by his father, Marvin enlisted in the U.S. Air Force. In 1957, Marvin was discharged and formed a doo-wop group called The Marquees, who backed Bo Diddley. The group backed Chuck Berry in the studio on “Almost Grown” and “Back in the U.S.A.”.

Marvin Gay added a silent “e” to his surname to distance himself from his father. In 1961 he released his first single, “Let Your Conscience Be Your Guide”. Several more non-charting releases came and went. But with his fourth single release, “Stubborn Kind Of Fellow”, Marvin Gaye peaked at #8 on the Billboard Hot R&B Singles chart. His followup, “Hitch Hike”, made the Top 30 on the Billboard Hot 100. While a further release, “Pride And Joy”, shot to #10 on the Hot 100 and, #15 in Winnipeg (MB), and #2 on the Hot R&B Singles chart in the summer of 1963. Another release, “Can I Get A Witness”, was a Top 15 hit in Winnipeg (MB) and #3 on the Hot R&B Singles chart.

Gaye racked up more Top Ten R&B hits in 1963-64. These include “You’re a Wonderful One” (#6 in Hamilton and #8 in Windsor), “Once Upon a Time” (with Mary Wells) which climbed to #3 in Windsor, Ontario, “What’s the Matter with You Baby” (with Mary Wells),  and “Try It Baby”. On May 23, 1964, Marvin Gaye appeared in concert at the Hollywood Bowl in New Westminster (BC).

Marvin Gaye returned to the Top Ten on the Hot 100 in the winter of 1964-65 with “How Sweet It Is (To Be Loved by You)”. While in 1965, Gaye topped the R&B charts with both “Ain’t That Peculiar” and “I’ll Be Doggone”. Both singles peaked at #8 on the Hot 100.

In 1966, Gaye had a #4 hit on the Hot Rhythm & Blues Singles chart with “One More Heartache”. Later that year “Little Darlin (I Need You)” reached #7 in Saint John, New Brunswick, and #10 on the Hot Rhythm & Blues Singles chart in the USA. Late in 1966, Marvin Gaye teamed up with Kim Weston to record “It Takes Two”. The single shot to #4 on the Hot R&B Singles chart and #5 in Windsor (ON). And from April 20th to 30th, 1966, – for eleven consecutive nights – Marvin Gaye was a headliner at The Cave supper club in Vancouver (BC).

In 1967, Marvin Gaye teamed up with Tammi Terrell and began recording a series of hit-making duets. This included “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough“, “Your Precious Love”, “Ain’t Nothing Like The Real Thing” and “You’re All I Need To Get By”.

In 1968, Marvin Gaye released his biggest hit single “I Heard It Through The Grapevine”.In the early 70s he released songs commenting on social-political issues: “What’s Going On” (about police brutality and war) and “Mercy, Mercy Me (the Ecology)” about the environment; “Trouble Man” and “Inner City Blues” about the challenges and adversity of the black experience America. His album What’s Going On, which featured all but “Trouble Man”, was spurred by Gaye’s effort to come to terms with the death of Tammi Terrell. “Trouble Man” was the theme-title of a blacksploitation film released in 1972.

Born Diane Ross in 1944 in Detroit, Michigan, Diana Ross was the lead singer in The Supremes. According to Ross, her mother actually named her “Diane”. However, there was a clerical error. This  resulted in her name being entered as “Diana” on her birth certificate. On the first recordings by The Supremes, she was listed as “Diane” Ross, and introduced herself as “Diane” as they began to hit the pop charts. Her friends and family still call her “Diane”. One of her neighbors growing up was future Motown recording artist Smokey Robinson. In 1958, at the age of 14, Diane Ross began taking classes including clothing design, millinery, pattern making, and tailoring, as she had aspired to become a fashion designer. She also took modeling and cosmetology classes at the school and participated in three or four other extracurricular activities while being there. In addition, she also worked at Hudson’s Department Store where she alleges she was the first black employee “allowed outside the kitchen.” At the time Ross was living in the Brewster-Douglass Housing Projects.

Ross became part of the Primettes in 1959. In the early 60s they became the Supremes. With Florence Ballard and Mary Wilson, Diana Ross’s Supremes began to record regular chart-toppers and Top Ten hits. These include their number-one hits “Where Did Our Love Go”, “Baby Love”, “Come See About Me”, “Stop! In The Name Of Love”, “Back In My Arms Again” and “I Hear A Symphony”. Another single, “Love Is Like An Itching In My Heart”, was a number-one hit in Vancouver in May 1966 while the Supremes were at The Cave supper club. More hits came for Diana Ross & the Supremes with “The Happening”, “Reflections”, “Love Child” and “Someday We’ll Be Together”. Ross left the group to pursue a solo career in 1970.

In 1970, Diana Ross had a number-one hit with a cover of the 1967 Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell hit “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough”. In 1971 she had a number-one hit in Ireland and the UK with “I’m Still Waiting”. In 1973, she was back on top in August 1973 with “Touch Me In The Morning”.

In September 1973, Gaye had a number-one pop and R&B hit with “Let’s Get It On”. While the song was topping the charts, Marvin Gaye and Diana Ross – both coming off their respective number-one solo hits – released an album of duets titled Diana and Marvin. They released “You’re A Special Part Of Me” that fall. It climbed to #4 on the Hot Soul Singles chart, and #12 on the Billboard Hot 100. A followup single from the album was “My Mistake (Was To Love You)”.

“My Mistake (Was To Love You)” was co-written by Pam Sawyer and Gloria Jones. Sawyer was born in London, England, in 1938. She married an American pianist in 1958 and moved to the USA. In 1965, she penned a Top 20 R&B hit for Chuck Jackson titled “If I Didn’t Love You”. That year “Try to Understand” for Lulu was a Top 30 hit in the UK, while “I Ain’t Gonna Eat My Heart Anymore” was a minor hit for the Young Rascals. In 1968, she penned “Love Child”, a number-one hit for Diana Ross and The Supremes, and the groups’ Top Ten followup hit “I’m Living In Shame”. In 1969, Sawyer wrote “My Whole World Ended” which was a Top Ten pop hit for David Ruffin (#2 R&B). And in 1970, Jr. Walker and the All Stars took “Gotta Hold On To This Feeling” to #2 on the Billboard R&B chart. Into the mid-70s, Pam Sawyer had more hits with Diana Ross who recorded “Last Time I Saw Him” which was a number-one Adult Contemporary hit in 1973. She also wrote “Love Hangover” which topped both the pop, dance and R&B charts in the USA for Diana Ross in 1976, and reached the Top Ten in the UK. In 1982, “Let Me Tickle Your Fancy” reached the Top 5 on the R&B charts for Jermaine Jackson (and Top 20 on the Hot 100). Surprisingly, Pam Sawyer’s biggest hit record was “The First Night” recorded by Monica in 1998. The single topped the Billboard Hot 100, R&B chart and dance charts in the USA, and reached #6 on the UK pop singles chart. In 2023, Sawyer was inducted into the Women Songwriter’s Hall of Fame.

Born in Cincinnati in 1945, Gloria Jones moved to Los Angeles in 1959 and began singing. While in high school, along with Billy Preston, she joined the COGIC Singers who would later release a gospel album in 1966 titled It’s A Blessing. In 1964 she began to record some singles with writer and producer Ed Cobb, who had been a member of the popular pop quartet the Four Preps since 1956. She recorded his song “Tainted Love” in late 1964, which became an international number-one hit for Soft Cell in 1982. This was one of twenty singles she would release variously in the USA and the UK between 1964 and 1979.

Jones worked as a backing vocalist with Charles Wright and the 103rd Street Rhythm Band, Neil Young, Jackie DeShannon on “Put A Little Love In Your Heart”, Ry Cooder, REO Speedwagon, Buffy Saint-Marie, Maria Muldaur, Joe Cocker, Elvin Bishop, John Kay, The Commodores, Harry Nilsson, T. Rex, Billy Preston and Eddie Floyd. As a songwriter, her biggest claim to fame is “If I Were Your Woman” which was co-written with Pam Sawyer and recorded by Gladys Knight & the Pips. Along with the group, Jones and Sawyer were nominated for a Grammy Award in 1972 in the Best R&B Performance by a Duo or Group with Vocal category. However, the award went to Ike & Tina Turner for their recording of “Proud Mary”. In 1971, Jr. Walker & the All Stars took Jones and Sawyer’s “Take Me Girl, I’m Ready” to #16 on the UK pop chart. After “My Mistake (Was To Love You)”, Gloria Jones wrote “Haven’t Stopped Dancing Yet” which reached #15 in the UK in 1978 for Gonzalez, and to #9 in the UK in 1989 for Pat & Mick. She also wrote songs recorded by Rare Earth, the Jackson 5, Billy Preston, Jermaine Jackson, Eddie Kendricks, the Miracles, Martha Reeves & The Vandellas, Chris Clark, David Ruffin and Jimmy Ruffin, and Bobby Taylor and the Vancouvers.

On September 16, 1977, Gloria Jones was driving Mini 1275 GT with her partner, T. Rex frontman Marc Bolan. The couple had a son, and Jones had recently been on tour with Bob Marley. At 4AM on September 16, 1977, Jones had a collision with a tree and Bolan died from the impact. After going to hospital for a broken jaw, she was later scheduled to appear in court in London on charges of being unfit to drive and of driving a car in a dangerous condition. However, she left the UK with her son and returned to the US before the court date, so the Coroner’s Court recorded a verdict of accidental death. In 2010, together with her son Rolan, she established the Marc Bolan School of Music & Film in Sierra Leone.

“My Mistake (Was To Love You)” is a song about regret. One partner admits “At the beginning, when I didn’t care…. You were sweeter than my very own kin. But what did I do for you? Not a thing. In front of my friends you broke me down. Since then darling, it’s hard to track you down.” The lyrics tell that in this relationship tenderness was returned with only disdain, mean-spiritedness and belittling. There are plenty of films, like “A Streetcar Named Desire” (1951) and “Marriage Story” (2019) which explore unhealthy relationships in free-fall.

“My Mistake (Was To Love You)” peaked at #2 in Tampa (FL), Colorado Springs (CO), and Auburn (ME), #3 in Ottawa, Sacramento (CA), and Worcester (MA), #4 in Montreal, Columbus (OH), and Pueblo (CO), #5 in Endicott (NY), #7 in Allentown (PA), and Tyler (TX), #8 in Daytona Beach (FL), and Huntsville (AL), #9 in Wilmington (DL), #10 in Palm Springs (CA), and #11 in Boston.

On February 6, 1975, Marvin Gaye performed in concert at the Maple Leaf Gardens in Toronto.

Marvin Gaye had more Top Ten hits with “I Want You” (1976), “Got To Give It Up” (1977), “Sexual Healing” (1982-83). On July 11, 1983, Marvin Gaye appeared in what would be his last concert in Canada at the Massey Hall in Toronto.

After her album of duets with Marvin Gaye, Diana Ross went on to record number-one hits with “Theme From Mahogany (Do You Know Where You’re Going To?)” and “Love Hangover”. Her biggest internationally successful hit was in 1980 with “Upside Down”. The single topped the pop charts in Australia, Denmark, Italy, New Zealand, Norway, South Africa, Sweden, Switzerland, and the USA. The song also made the Top 5 in Austria, Belgium, Canada, Finland, France, Ireland, the Netherlands, the UK and West Germany. Ross also had a Top Ten hit with “I’m Coming Out” in 1980. While in 1981, she had an international hit in a duet with Lionel Ritchie titled “Endless Love”. Further Top Ten hits in the early 80s include “Muscles”, “Mirror Mirror” and “Why Do Fools Fall In Love”.

On April 1, 1984, Marvin Gaye was shot and killed by his father, Marvin Gay Sr. the day before Gaye’s 45th birthday. The scene was his parents home in Los Angeles. Gay Sr. was charged with first-degree murder, but following diagnosis of a brain tumor, the charge was reduced to voluntary manslaughter. Immediately after his death, numerous fans of Gaye stood outside the house at Gramercy Place, placed memorabilia and other items on the lawn, and held vigils there, until the next day, Gaye’s birthday. At the time of his death, Gaye was said to be working on a new album.

On May 10, 1984, Marvin Gaye appeared posthumously on the cover of Rolling Stone magazine. In the fall of 1984, Diana Ross released a single titled “Missing You”, a dedicated to Marvin Gaye.

Starting in 1986, Washington D.C. began celebrating Marvin Gaye Day in the city. In November 2018, Marvin Gaye appeared on a United States postage stamp. A biopic was mounted in 2006 titled Sexual Healing, detailing the story of Marvin Gaye. In the mid-2010s it ran into steep resistance by Gaye’s family. In 2021 it was announced that a biopic about Marvin Gaye titled What’s Going On was in production.

October 3, 2025
Ray McGinnis

References:
Kevin Jagernauth, “Watch: 4-Minutes Of Footage From Stalled Marvin Gaye Biopic ‘Sexual Healing’ Starring Jesse L. Martin,” Indiewire.com, September 18, 2013.
Mike Fleming Jr., “Warner Bros Lands Allen Hughes-Directed Marvin Gaye Film ‘What’s Going On’; Dr. Dre, Jimmy Iovine To Produce,” Deadline.com, June 17, 2021.
“Marvin Gaye’s Father and Killer Dies,” BBC, October 25, 1998.
“Marvin Gaye is Shot and Killed,: Pop Singer’s Father Faces Charge,” New York Times, April 2, 1984.
David Ritz, Divided Soul: The Life of Marvin Gaye, De Capo Press, 2003.
Michael Eric Dyson, Mercy, Mercy Me: The Art, Loves and Demons of Marvin Gaye, Civetas Books, 2004.
Diana Ross, “Missing You“, 1984.
Steve Armitage, “Pam Sawyer: One of Motown’s Most Distinctive Lyricists,” Blues and Soul, No. 102, pp 22-23, 1973.
On This Day, “1977: T-Rex Singer Killed in Car Smash,” BBC, September 16, 2005.
Novena Carmel and Michael Barnes, “Gloria Jones in Conversation,” KCRW, Santa Monica, CA, August 28, 2024.
Gladys Knight and The Pips, “If I Were Your Woman“, The Ed Sullivan Show, February 7, 1971.
A Streetcar Named Desire, 1951.
Marriage Story, 2019.

CFGO 1440-AM Ottawa Top Ten | August 12, 1974